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Although 2 Corinthians 9 deals with attitudes about giving money, the general principle can also apply to giving ourselves—our time, energy, attention, focus, even our bodies—in sexual intimacy and friendship.

In the darkness, I can listen to Dan’s prayers and get a glimpse into the things he’s grateful for as well as the issues that are troubling him.Before we know it, we’ve drifted so far apart that the person we share our bed with no longer shares our life.“The pursuit of marriage needs to be intentional,” Goetz said, “because if you default to the values of our culture, you’ll pursue the sprawling house, the great body, the accomplished kids.But you’ll let your marriage drift.”Goetz said that passivity—not taking initiative in marriage—is a spiritual issue. When I’m pursuing other interests and not actively pursuing my spouse’s interests, I’m putting my needs first.“That’s a spiritually dangerous and crippling place to be,” Goetz said.Acts I don’t remember when Dan and I started praying together, but I do recall that our first attempts felt awkward.For a long time we only prayed the Lord’s Prayer out loud together.